Take me to the water.

So I havent written in quite a while. Probably because A LOT has been going on.

Its funny how there are waves of business, when looking back on everything - most of the time I feel like I couldn´t be busier.

So two weekends ago, we had our optional Ignatian silent retreat. 36 hours in silence while still surrounded by 23 of the 24 of us was as close to privacy as I can get, so I took that opportunity with open arms. I´ll be the first to say that I´ve been questioning my religious views - not faith or spirituality (...there is a difference) - since I´ve been here. But after the retreat I figured that its okay, not all the answers have to come to me at once. It´s not going to just take one weekend to think about all of these things, it´s a lifetime of thought and change, just like everything else is in this world.

Oh, and Ryan fell through a roof.

Ryan is my praxis partner, full of life and we joke because it was probably hardest for him to be silent on this retreat, but he did it (more or less) until he fell through the roof he was walking on and ended up with 10 stiches in his head and a pretty bruised and scraped armpit, chest, and ego. He just read that too, so he´s vouching for it.

So that meant I was on my own Monday for sewing academy and class in Jayaque. Drug class.

It was a HORRIBLE DAY. I cannot emphasize it enough. Sewing academy was painless, but the kids just did not listen. Well some did, 3 out of 17, and the other 14 decided to play, talk and disrupt. It was just body breaking, really. To try to lead a discussion with 17 kids ranging from 8 years old to 16. Worst, I thought I was at an advantage after staying up until past 1am planning what to draw on the board, different scenarios to act out, and drawings for visuals. I felt like a failure. I wanted to walk out when the recess bell rang, and I don´t mean to go out to play. But I couldn´t, of course. I know myself better than that. I know that I´m going to beat myself up for not getting through to every single one of them, but I have to think about the fact that there are a few who were listening, a few more on and off, and no one else is there to give them this space to be open and ask questions. I do not know them, but I love them.

Tomorrow Ryan will be there and we´ll split up the groups.

The rest of the week went well. Wednesday in Jayaque was fabulous. We spent all day by the river in Los Sitios with Julio, Neto, and Julio´s nieces and nephews. We swam in the river and made chicken noodle soup for lunch over a fire. It was a gift. Not everyday is going to be difficult. We´re not always going to be stuck in one mood of happiness or angst, hopefulness or hopelessness - and its nice to know that things will change.

This weekend was fantastic. We went to Belize in order to renew our 90 day "tourist" visas - because student visas are just too complicated.

Here is what I sent Dad in an email this afternoon. Pictures will follow later in the week if I can, but the next two weeks coming up will be busy. Max is flying in tomorrow to visit for a few days, then Amy, Ally and I will be travelling together to Costa Rica for our week break - finishing out the weekend in Jayaque next Friday, Saturday, Sunday for the outdoor dance-club that I have heard so much about.



So Belize...

We literally JUST got off the bus back from Belize this weekend. It was an incredible time. We left Thursday at 6am, drove 8 hours through Guatemala to the northern coast (Carribean) and hopped a 30´ boat (all hull, no luxury, all smiles, no complaints) to Punta Gorda (or PG to those familiar), Belize. It was quite different because English is spoken there primarily over Spanish. Its a mostly Mayan culture, with many Afro-Belizians as well. So there are 2 Mayan languages, 1 Creole language, English and Spanish all spoken there. It was crazy to use English the whole weekend with the natives. Belize is a totally different country, has more of a Carribbean island feel than a Latin American country.

Ally outside the main cabin in Belize

So once we got through customs (which as a hut of a joke) we hopped on a old school bus turned charter to Blue Creek Rainforest Lodge. We were foretold the accomodations were going to be pretty rustic, so I was expecting difficult and dirt with cramped space, but that wasn´t anything close to the truth. We pull up to the village before we take the short hike into the jungle and are greeted by 20 kids, all asking us in English to take our bags. It was heart wrenching to say no, but we had to for whatever reason we told ourselves. You just can´t say yes. After the 10 minute walk on the trail, we arrived to the lodge. Finally. And what we saw was breathtaking. This perfectly blue, clear river created from the natural water given off by the HUGE limestone mountains further up. There was a main cabin where the bathrooms and kitchen were, a huge deck in front with a big ole dock to jump off and plunge 10 feet into the water with fish below waiting to gently nip at you. Not bad though, only got it once or twice. We stayed in the smaller cabins for 6 people, built a bonfire in front of our cabins, and swam our hearts out. Friday we went on a "jungle climb" 1200 feet straight up to the top of the mountain. It was rigorous, but we were in the shade for the most part, covered up by the trees.

Top of the jungle climb. 1200ft straight up.

Termite on the tongue

We found a huge termite nest on the way up and William, our guide, told us that he has eaten termites before for "just the experience" of it, which is how he lives his life, and they taste like carrots. So I tried a few, and found out he wasn´t joking... about these termites, anyway. Friday afternoon we went exploring through the cave at the base of the river which is within the mountain, and swam through the dark tunnels there. To get up to the base, we climbed all sorts of muddy, limestone-spiked rocks and swang off rope tied to the trees. Belize left me with many bruises on my legs, but I loved it.

I never want to stop climbing.

Saturday morning we woke up early to walk into the village and go to Williams house for a food and craft demonstration. We made tortillas (different from Salvadoran tortillas), chocolate drink and wove fans from palmettos. The chocolate drink was great, straight from the cacao plant. We ate the fruit (tastes like "Starburst" as someone put it - tarty, sweet, and smooth fruit), and next toasted previously dried seeds, ground them up and made them into a paste. For a sweeter chocolate they dry the seed with the fruit still on it, but you have to add a ton of sugar either way.

Saturday afternoon we just chilled and swam more, climbing rocks, laying out in the sun and just enjoying nature. Yours truly became obsessed with fan making, so I went hunting for more palmetto leaves. Don´t compare me to Martha Stuart though, or I´ll show you my machete.

OH and Friday night we went on a jungle hike and saw some tarantulas, scoprions, toads, fish and shrimp.Colin, Roe, Anthony on the way up